Why is moving on so hard

Love is what everyone wants to find. Love is an elusive friend. I so need you please be mine. I have been patient and true so come running love I so want you. Haha, nice. I fell in love, whilst being in a long term relationship. I broke up w my gf a year ago and i still cant move on after what we have gone through together its s hard for me to forget abt the memories. Once I went to his home and he open the door but he slammed the door on my face without saying a word.

Hi Lidia I hope you are doing well now and growing strong, putting yourself as your first priority. This is worth reading. I realised after a few months I was becoming obsessed with fantasy of what I was hoping our relationship could have been, rather than what it was. And the reality is… certainly not the fantasy.

After 31 years he cheated…then he left. I cry all the time. I am trying to find my inner strength and then I get sucked back under. I let my opponent win, tarnishing my record and plunging myself into a depression. No matter how many comments and blogs I read, nothing can mend my heart. Please tell me how to fix myself, or get rid of those who ruined me. Thank you for this post.. Its hard to move on when you always see that person everyday and just doing fine, and had to pretend that you are too while your not, being jealous of whos chasing him around and not loving him is harder than he knows.

I want to give it a try over and over and over again and I find myself drowned just to save our relationship. Its not easy! No one to talk to. I am also going through the same thing. The difference is that his actions still gives me a reason to fight for our love but his words always tells me to move on. I am so confused. I am still hoping we would end up together. Help please. Nothing I do works. Thank you for sharing, I now see that I am not alone…. I do hope we will find that love we deserve one day.

Take care! Just accept this denial as a lesson and make it as an opportunity to become more disciplined human being. Try not to dwell on the past and stop the blame game. After all this is a lesson that no one will ever taught. Be thankful for them. You still have chances to fix your shortcomings and concentrate on the better version of yourself. Moving on is easier said than done. They say 1 month you will feel better.

My stubbornness is nailing me to a life suffering. Right before my 26 years marriage divorce was finalized, I jumped into a relationship hoping this will help me forget my past and move on. I am suffering. I fell for a guy and I never chase them but I did with this one, and it really hurt me when it ended, but it allowed me to grow so much. In ways, I never knew how. I broke up with my boyfriend today. I still love him but our relationship is becoming more and more toxic than what it was before.

He is taking me for granted. I gave him a million chance to be with me because he always say that he loves me but after that, we are going in circles again and again treating me like a trash. It hurts. May we find the love we deserve that will make us never remember ever experiencing this.

Same here…. I miss him so much still though…. Thanks for your tips. However, do you really think that it is possible to stay positive while in the process of moving on? Can I really resist talking bitter and so on? I feel like someone comforted me by reading this article. My gf broke me up just this while ago. Hope to apply what I have learned from you-author of this article. They come yes! Thank you for this article, it lighten my feelings.. He just told me Move on with your life!

Cheer up…value yourself for the sake of your baby. So faithing girl! Had break-up. Unable to move on after 6 months also. Hopefully after reading this article, things would be bit smooth. Also, how to stop yourself from trying to get in that relationship? Create lines as final words to say to him. Forget the name, forget how you saw him. Uninstall social media apps- to avoid quotes running at your timeline. Focus on how to grow. Be independent and someday, he is just someone passby. We question ourselves: Why did they not want to be with me?

Am I not lovable? Is there something wrong with me? If these are the questions you always ponder on, then it is the case of bruised ego rather than a broken heart. The feeling of inadequacy will start to creep in, and hinder the process of recovering from the breakup.

We Blame Ourselves After the breakup, our mind turns into overdrive. We try to overanalyze everything we said and did, and find reasons behind it. We start to develop feelings of guilt, and because of that, we blame ourselves for ruining the relationship. We are on the go with the 'What If' questions. What if I had said that instead of this, or done that instead of this. It is important to stop with these things because you cannot go back in time and change it. It is important to get over the spiral of guilt and blame in order to move forward and get over the breakup.

Love Is an Addiction There are a number of studies, such as of Helen Fisher, that show that the chemical reaction caused by love in the brain is similar to that caused by drugs. Similarly, the breakup has similar impact when the withdrawal of drugs takes place.

And, isn't it difficult to get over the addiction? When your choice of drug is taken away from you, you think obsessively about them. You are yearning them and you are ready to do anything to get them back, even if they were not good for you. This fixation in love causes the person to see reality in a distorted way.

The craving of the positive emotional and physical connection does not go away easily, and hence, keeps the person stuck in the past. Breaking Up Is Stressful Breaking up is stressful. About the Author. With a background in education and as the mother of two children, she has led numerous talks and programmes on the subject of Helping Children with Loss.

She practises with individual clients and groups as a Grief Recovery Specialist in Luxembourg. Tagged as: Heartbreak , Loss of partner. Share this post:. Please leave blank:. Email address:. I have read your privacy policy and consent to my name and comment being published on your site. Our site uses cookies. For more information, see our cookie policy. Accept cookies and close Reject cookies Manage settings.